Republican Primary

Let’s Do The Political Timewarp Again

We’re in a heated primary in this country for the presidential nomination.

We’ve got a candidate that is inevitably going to be the party’s candidate despite little support from his actual party. He’s a completely white bread candidate from Massachusetts, is incredibly loaded and comes off awkwardly at campaign events. His main competition appeals to the common man, is quick to bring up his blue-collar roots, and has a serious passion for sweaters.

Wait, when the hell did it become 2004 again?

True Life: I want to be President of The United States

By Michael Newberger |

It seems every subsequent election year, most people say to themselves “There’s no way that this could get any more ridiculous,” and I realize four years from now I’ll probably being saying this again as political ads become somehow personalized by our facebook interests. “Hi Bob! I see you you like the Pittsburgh Steelers! I’m Rick Santorum and I love em’ too! I also think that gays are bringing down the moral fiber of our country! Check out my link!”

But so far this Republican primary race has been a spectacle that is both supremely entertaining, while also hinting at the dystopian landscape that politics is starting to turn into.